Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Meatless Wednesday

I was supposed to get some activity in after work but honestly traffic was so annoying I got a headache and decided to skip it.  oh well.  
I am really trying not to get too down on myself about the fact that I have gained back so much of the weight that I lost.  Its frustrating and I feel like a failure every time I look in the mirror.  I just feel so sluggish and frumpy and...honestly....i feel like a slob! I am really making a conscious effort to stop the negative self talk because I know its not productive. 

I am working all this week and then I will be off from work until the third of january.  YAY!! I am really looking forward to my vacation.  I really plan on using that time to focus on getting used to staying active and eating healthy so that when I go back to work it will be second nature.  I started working in April. I remember during my first month of work I was weighing in at around 166.  That means that I have gained just about 14 lbs since I started.  Thats crazy!  I don't even have an excuse.  All I know is that since working exercise has taken the back seat and I haven't spent as much time preparing my meals like I should.  I am a work in progress. 

As far as my eating - I had a meatless day today!! It wasn't really on purpose.  After I finished lunch I realized I had not had any meat for the day and I decided what the heck.  Why not just have a meatless dinner as well?

2 slices WW whole grain bread
1 egg
1 oz smoked salmon
5 pts

Amy's Black bean tamale
1 c tofu
14 pts

75 gold fish
5 pts

2/3 c tofu (curried)
3/4 c white rice
1 tsp sesame oil
1/2 tsp olive oil
1/4 c soy milk
8 pts
 I really did not want to have white rice for dinner, but my mother had a christmas party this past weekend and there were sooooo many left overs (including the white rice) that it didnt make sense for me to cook brown rice.  I didn't want to waste food..just sayin....

Total for the day: 32 Weekly Bonus Points Used: 3

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

My pants are tight.

Today I restarted my C25K training program.  i restarted on Week 2 Day 1 and let me tell you my legs were talking to me the whole time.  I think they were confused since they thought we quit this whole training thing last month.  I am determined to see this plan through though.

It always helps when you have a buddy - like I said in my previous post, I have a friend that I have recruited to run a 5K with me in mid-february.  She lives in Tampa so we will be training separately, but its fun having someone to check in with.  Plus she is a bit more competitive than I am so I know I will be motivated the whole time to stay on track.  I've been trying to get my boyfriend to run the race as well and he says he will.  I am not sure if he actually wants to or if he just wants to be supportive.  We'll see what happens. 

Monday, December 20, 2010

mish mosh of everything.


I feel like a failure. 
For me, weight loss and healthy living is such a constant struggle.  Every time i think i have it all figured out, I hit this mental roadblock that just totally derails me and i lose my focus.  I become rebellious and pass up the fuji apple for the second slice of pumpkin pie.  I start compromising and I tell myself that a five pound gain isn't THAT serious....i can work that off in two weeks right? RIGHT? .... not really.

Those 5 pound gains really add up when the time to get my head back in the game never comes.  Next week's promise to start counting my points again turns into next month.  Or maybe the month after that.   My clothes still fit right? RIGHT? ....not really.  I would like to unbutton my pants as I type this. 

The journey from 159 to 179 lbs really happens in the blink of an eye....well at least faster than it took me to go from 179 to 159.  Weight loss shouldnt be a round trip. :(

Okay enough of the complaining/pity party. Its really time to take the reins on this and quit effing around.

The Weight Watchers program has undergone a few changes recently and it kinda feels like i'm learning how to do this all over again.  Points values for most foods have changed along with my daily target and weekly points allowance.  It's annoying that I have to look up the point values for foods I have been eating forever, but there is a certain novelty about the whole program now that makes me feel like I am having a fresh start. 
So I am back on the program and ready to eat right and focus on exercising.

I can't remember if I ever wrote about this but one of my goals has always been to become a really I am serious! I don't know why.  Maybe running to me represents the ultimate in fitness.  I am envious of those people who can just lace up their sneakers and head out for an "easy" 5 mile run. I've never been able to do that and recently I have been thinking about changing that fact.

For a few weeks last month I began following the C25k program for beginners who want to train to race in a 5K.  I really liked it and it made me feel like I was on my way to become one of those crazy people that I always see.  Day light savings time kicked in and it became too dark for me to run out doors after work.  It was really important to me to run outside rather than on a treadmill.  I feel like treadmill running isnt an accurate comparison to running outdoors and running on the treadmill isn't really that difficult for me.  So now I really want to challenge myself to follow the program and get to the point where I can run/jog 3.1 miles (5K) without stopping. 

And that is why I decided to sign up for my first 5K (GASP!!)

Yea you read correctly.  I signed up to run a 5K in mid-february.  I figured that would give me enough time to get through the training program.  Signing up kinda forces me to get out there and train for it. did i mention there was a registration fee? If for no other reason, my ass needs to train for this so that I don't feel like I flushed my money down the drain! I am kinda excited about it and I have recruited a friend to participate with me.  For the next 8 weeks I plan on including my training updates here.

Weight Watchers bagel
1 oz smoked salmon
1/2 weight watchers reduced fat cream cheese
6 pts
 (not pictured)

Steamed broccoli
Amy's Indian Matar Tofu
7 pts

pineapple, kiwi, strawberries
2 large shrimp
baby carrots
55 gold goldfish (yeah i counted them!)
5 pts
 (not pictured)

1 large potato
2 tsp olive oil
1/2 c light soy milk
3 slices canadian bacon
red onion
1/3 c part skim mozzarella cheese
2 tbsp sour cream
13 pts

I'll insert the pictures later!

Total for the day: 31 Weekly Bonus Points Used: 2